Travelin Monkey

Saturday, yesterday, we left Fortuna to look for the Los Angeles Cloud Forest. We were having a great time being jackasses in the car and laughed all the way there, until, that is, we reached the cloud forest and noticed that the hotel was closed for renovations until NOVEMBER!

So, we kept on going towards San Jose, but no one really wanted to STAY in San Jose. We ended up in a small town 60 km shy of San Jose, but the only place to stay was a run down hooker hotel. We got to San Jose and were very displeased with the places recommended to stay in our guide book, really shady stuff. We ended up driving around to look for Casa Leo. Judy ended up finding an Inn and it turned out to be alright. We had a ton to drink during happy hour, double caipirinhias!!!! Then, left to El Pueblo to party!

We had a great dinner and a ton more to drink, mixed it with some dancing and laughing our asses off. All us drunk bastards left to go dance at the club next door. Jabran danced with a nasty hooker with her pot belly sticking out. We partied until midnight, then came home to rest. HAHA They complained that I went to take a dump and left the door open, so none of them could rest because of the smell I left! HAHAH

I ran a fever, got delirious, and got a bad ear infection, so I stayed in while everyone went shopping. Today, we went to return the car. We had no idea where we were going, but somehow Matt & I found our way from Fortuna to San Ramon. Either way, here we are. The people at the hotel tried to charge us $5 because they said we tore some bedsheets. They keep on calling me Don Travelin Monkey for some reason, but I refuse to pay the $5 for the sheets!

I did, however, have an interesting lunch. The inn is called the Dunn Inn and it is across the street from the Amon placa - Cafete De La Lus, established August 9, 1889. That wouldn’t mean much, except that on that day it was the third city in the world to receive electricity!!!!!!

The trip is finally coming down to the last couple of hours. We left Montezuma and headed to Fortuna. We all woke up and got to Paquera to take the ferry at 6 am. On our way to Montezuma, I told the captain that Avani (the indian) had never seen a ship before and wanted to drive the ship, so he let her! HAHA! And there was this little boy that had an eye for Judy and kept harrassing her!

On our way back, Judy was the only one awake with me (I drove and was going to continue to drive to Fortuna). We ended up sticking chewed bubble gum on everyone’s forehead! HAHA

It was a very LONG trip to Fortuna, but we made it and found a 2 bedroom 2 bathroom house for $75 a night! On the 23rd, we went white water rafting in class III/IV rapids on Rio Torro. It was an amazing adventure, and we had to work really hard because the guide put my fat ass in the front, Jabran behind me, and the 3 girls on one side. We had a LOT of close calls, but eventually, we actually did flip over. Hazel and I got caught under a current and we were both scared shitless because we kept on getting rammed against the rock wall. Eventually, they threw a line to us and we made it back to shore.

That night, Peter and I drank god knows how many liters of beer while everyone else took part in other festivities. Peter is a funny guy, but that doesn’t surprise me, since we share the same twisted humor.

On the 24th, we took a day excursion to the Arenal Volcano, a live volcano. The guys made it to the lava rock area quickly, and waited there, hiding behind a tree. I walked with the girls, and as soon as we got there, they jumped out. What did the girls do apart from screamind? Yup, they grabbed me and pushed me towards the tree. Can you feel the love?

Judy & I couldn’t see the point of crossing 2 kms of lava rock, so we stayed behind and had about a 4 hour long conversation under the grueling sun. Maybe we should have gotten the car key so we wouldn’t get stuck under the sun with no shade? We did, however, see the volcano erupt and saw lava flow, except it was during the day and it just looked like flowing stone.

We went bar hopping that night and ended up taking some beers to the volcano to see if we could catch it erupting at night, but we were only able to hear it rumble.

The day is over and soon Montezuma will be no more. What we lived here will truely be a bonding experience none of us will ever forget!

The drive yesterday was not easy, the roads were uncomfortable, and the obstacles great, including various flat tires and issues finding a resting spot. We couldn’t seem to get out of Manuel Antonio, some jack ass decided to give me the wrong directions, but eventually we made it up to Jaco. We stopped off for a little to check out the black sand beach and relax, then hopped back in the car and continued the drive.

We crossed over in a ferry and continued driving towards Montezuma, which was interesting because most of the road signs were erased with black spray paint and Matt & I were, for the most part, guessing as to which direction Montezuma was. We stopped by to eat at this lady’s resteraunt and she served us whole fried fish. Hazel was loving it, the rest of the girls, not so much! HAHA

We ended up staying at this $5 a night place that smelled like piss, but it was right on the beach! The first night, the 20th of Sept, we got arrested, and I won’t mention why. The station was located next door to where we were and the cops didn’t have the keys to the place. jabran thought they weren’t real cops, but they were. I had the fortune of being the only Spanish speaking person, doubling as their translator to interrogate my friends (gee, I wonder what I told them?). I was drunk, and getting progressively drunker as the night went on. Just like magic, or was it the alcohol, I began to converse, laugh, and make jokes with the cops!

They told me that we were supposed to pay $200 each to get out, and we ended up bringing the bribe down to $150 for all 7 of us. It would have been cheaper if the girls didn’t have all their cash and their passports on them. We were in front of our hotel room with NO WINDOWS, why they brought that I will never understand!

Today, we woke up and went on a waterfall excursion. We found some road that had a sign that said “waterfall –>” so we followed! We crossed some river and climbed around until we hit the end and found the waterfalls. Judy took a belly flop trying to climb some rocks, and on our return, the girls kept on getting swept away by the river! We then went beach hunting and found this one area that had these HUGE ENORMOUS waves crashing into the rocks, causing water to splash really high in the air. It was awesome. We then went the opposite side and found a nice beach to crash on. On the way back, a wave crashed that sent a fallen tree rumbling my way, destroying my leg and my sandles.. always me!

At night, drank and drank and drank. We eat had an entre` with about 10 caipirinhias a pop for US$10 per person! We were SOOOO drunk it was fantastic. Peter ended up adopting a small pup that some little boy was beating and brought it to the room with us. The 4 guys slept in one room and the 3 girls in another. At about 3:30 am, the little pup kept on crying and feel from the top bunk. We had farted so much and there was such a lack of circulating air, that the temperature in the room was like 1000 degrees and the pup wanted to end it’s life.

We woke the girls up, and now everyone is getting ready to take off. The owner from Peru made us Noni drinks (smells like diarrhea, but tastes alright) and we are off to check out the Arenal volcano!

Yesterday, we went out to the Manuel Antonio national park. We walked around enjoying the exotic creatures until we hit the beach proper. We all started to swim and enjoy the day, until it was time to start the water games and be the true jack-asses that we always have been and always will be. We started climbing on each other’s backs, jumping into the water, attempting triple-deckers for what seemed like hours of fun.

After a while, we started to explore again and found a side path through the jungle off of the main path we were traveling on. We decided to take it even though there were no signs, leading us who knew where, with obstacles we had no clue about! The path was simple, not too much of a climb, some river we had to cross was probably the only real big thing, but wow, when we hit the end! The end was a magnificent waterfall. We started to lounge around, under the waterfall to get a nice massage, then Matt & I decided to climb up and were on top of the waterfall!

We went exploring some more and found two more beaches. Hazel was surprised by a monkey next to her on the beach while Matt & I dozed off under the sun. We left the park and went to grub in front of the beach. At night, we got HAMMERED and played some more Jenga. Then, we went to the pool under the rain and started playing stupid pool games to drink some more (like we needed an excuse?).

I went to sleep at some point, but Burke was drunk, so he decided to wake me up and wrestle. And that is all I got..

We landed and rented a car. I drove all day down the Costa Ricean coast. It was possibly the most relaxing drive I have ever made; lush greenery, awesome sights, off-roading for most of it cause of a detour. Although we were 7 in the car, I did it all by myself being the only one awake! I drove 15 km off the road towards a place that advertised a waterfall and lunch. No one was awake to tell me otherwise, haha, and it sucked big time.

We crossed like 3 bridges that were wide enough for a single car and made out of either wood or huge blocks of cement. We got an awesome room with a patio and a view of the Manuel Antonio coast! We all had a great time last night, drinking, laughing, and playing JENGA! We checked out the beach for a while, but ended up driving around most of the day looking for a place to crash. We ate at the hotel, which was alright, and everyone got introduced to my beverage of choice; caipirinhia!! YAY!

A Uruguayan, a mormon, an indian, a filipino, an afghan, a chinese guy, and a jewish girl all board a plane. Nope, this isn’t a joke, it is the first of many adventures I’ve been looking forward to!!

That’s right people! The UN is traveling to COSTA RICA!!! We left San Francisco towards San Jose, Costa Rica. I screwed up in LAX. I thought I would be smart and take 2 of our backpacks on the plane from LAX because of my ability to board first. I ALWAYS check to see if they need volunteers to give up their seats, but I guess I was too excited? They offered $450 and first class the next day, but I screwed up and boarded the plane. After 9-11 they don’t allow you to get off and we missed it! They even had 7 spots they were looking for!

Why, oh why, they decided to send the Afghan guy to go get the chump with the beard off the plane I will never understand, but Costa Rica here we come!!